Puppies, fairytales and things.

I am a firm believer that people need a focus. Now, for most of us that is our family, our jobs, our dreams, whatever. But I do believe everyone has a central theme in their life and sort of fall into a couple categories. Bear with me as I explain these, and then you hopefully will see why I think it's important to understand these motivations of self. Quite probable that we are all some of each, just in different proportions, but you'll understand my drift.

People-centric. These are the lovers. They might be introverts or extroverts, (polite cough inserted here) but either way they live to love. People might be their family or friends that they make their family, but it gives them a great deal of happiness and satisfaction just to give affection. It makes them feel accepted and like their life has some importance if there are people for them to love. In the absence of people to love, they tend to become withdrawn and unmotivated. These people are me.

Goal-centric. These people have things to do. They very directly have things they must get done in this life and nothing will stand in their way. I thought I was one of these people for a long time, much to my detriment. This still comprises a good deal of my functionality, but it is not who my soul is or how I keep going day in and out.

Thing-centric. Okay okay, so most of you probably read that and think I am being mean and going to deride this, but that's not the case. This discussion is not about people of mean spirit, (note: I mean that in the sense of having a spirit that is less than on its way to enlightenment, a spirit that is not on the path to understanding itself, one that is basal, not mean in the sense of the evil or malevolent overtone) but just about different sets of people as self-actualized as can be. Back to the point. These are people for whom the acquisition and investigation of things can be its own end. I understand this the least but I've seen some people capable of deriving pure pleasure out of things: understanding their mechanics or enjoying their benefits or enjoying the possibilities they offer...etc. These are not inherent things of the items themselves but rather can act as catalysts for these individual, tools, if you will.

Now, I can't say that I do or ever will understand EVERYTHING about anyone, including myself. However, understanding these basic motivations is a very useful tool in helping you to understand how you can best snuggle someone you care about.

Case in point: I only just over the weekend watched someone I care very deeply about find her focus again. I don't mean she had lost it, but hadn't obviously had it in her life for some time. She got a puppy and I watched all of her loving personality bubble up to the surface and just cascade out of her. For reasons we all have from time to time, she had been holding back her love (and she's one of the first sort) looking for a repository, and KABAM! here it was. In the form of a small cuddly baby pup. Puppy for the win.

I think this is actually what fairytales are all about. We have things we are seeking in this life, and when we find them it's almost like the stars align and Prince Charming is Sean Connery and we are all happy. It's finding whatever your proverbial pot of gold is, and then making sure to keep it as long as you are able. For me, his name is Orion. He'll let me give him all the love I have to give and not complain. Mainly because he can't speak and has no thumbs to run away, but hey, let's not split hairs. Some day I'll have more, I know that. But for now, this is enough, it's enough. (for full understanding of the last statement, see 'Love Actually')